Two weeks ago, every first-year student spent a day in the experimental Harvard Business School Global Leader series grappling with the myriad of issues surrounding the newspaper industry’s struggle to successfully move its business online.  In considering strategies for one’s dating life and whether to pursue an online distribution strategy, the savvy HBS dater has much to learn from the successes and mistakes of the newspaper industry.

Overconfidence in the Status Quo: Newspapers were slow to act in the face of the internet’s rising popularity as a news source because they assumed that people would always want to sit down with their Sunday paper and morning coffee. As the younger generation began consuming their news and information online, the newspaper industry scurried to catch up. Similarly, the courtship process is fundamentally changing. The ubiquity of text messaging, Facebook, and the emerging industry of online dating sites has made online dating an innovative and appealing alternative to find that special someone.

Timing is important but not everything: In the newspaper industry, the first newspapers to move into the online space were not necessarily the most successful. The same is true for online dating. Those who rush into the space without an integrated strategy risk wasting their time and money. While there is a certain level of urgency to making sure that your dating life has an online component, it is worth taking the time to consider the best outlet, target audience, and your business model before rushing into the space.

Concerns regarding cannibalization: Many of the newspapers were reluctant to launch online versions because they feared that they would cannibalize their traditional business lines. However, we are all familiar with the saying that it’s better to eat your own lunch before someone else does. Time spent getting to know people online may eat into the time you have to spend scoping the dating scene in real life, but many of your competitors are already thriving online and poaching valuable customers (i.e. dates) that could have been yours.

Walled Garden vs. Wide Open: The New York Times was unsuccessful in pursuing a “walled garden” strategy in which it attempted to make readers pay for access to the content. However, some newspapers such as The Guardian were able to tap into a dedicated community of readers who were willing to pay to be a part of a large affinity group. Similarly, the HBS online dater has to decide in what ways he will make his content available. Will he pursue a walled garden strategy via Match.com and Loveawake where only paying users can communicate with him and see the picture that goes along with his profile? Or will he use one of the free dating sites such as Ok Cupid where he has the potential to reach a wider but arguably “lower quality” audience? Unlike the newspaper industry, the HBS dater can simultaneously pursue a walled garden and wide open strategy.

Targeting Specific Audiences: Moving online allowed newspapers the opportunity to reach different audiences. No longer did they have to rely on weekly topic verticals; they could change online content to match the preferences of the user. In the same way, the HBS dater can stop exhausting herself trying to find the finance guys at the VC/PE Conference, the creative types in the Talent Show, and the non-HBSers at Boston bars. Online dating allows you to easily target different audiences through the various sites that target certain groups. Some popular sites for specific audiences are JDate for Jewish singles and PrideDating.com for gay singles. HBS daters might be interested in EntrepreneurDating.com or the Forbes-recognized MillionaireMatch.com.

Creating Dynamic Content: Many newspapers made the mistake of simply transposing their traditional news format on to the internet. They did not recognize the full potential of the internet’s ability to provide constantly-changing real-time information customized to the user. In the same way, the HBS online dater has to remember that online dating is not about joining a dating website and letting a static profile just sit there unchanged. Online dating gives you the opportunity to constantly update content, respond to feedback from your customers, and engage your audience.

Profitability: Newspapers still struggle to make their online platforms sufficiently profitable. However, the ROI for an online dater is quite high. For example, a woman at HBS who invests $20 per month for a Loveawake.com profile has the potential for huge returns. A back-of-the-envelope calculation demonstrates the following for one month of dating:

Investment: $20

3 dates per week x $50 spent on her per date (e.g. dinner and a movie) x 4 weeks per month = $600 value

Thus, ROI is $600/$20 = 3000% return

Thus, the subscription fees associated with some online dating sites are dwarfed by the quick and huge guaranteed returns.

Action Plan: For HBS men and women seeking to increase their circulation, I recommend the following action plan:

• Join Loveawake. Among the many dating sites, Loveawake.com has a user-friendly interface, a critical mass of people who participate, and requires little commitment ($20/month for a three-month subscription or $35 for a one-month subscription).
• Create an appealing profile. Create an authentic, interesting, and attractive profile that highlights the best parts of your personality. Put up high-quality pictures, and ask your male and female friends for their opinion of your profile so they can filter out anything that seems normal to you but sounds or looks awkward to others.
• Contact people. On Loveawake.com, you “wink” at people to indicate your interest or can send them an email directly using a disguised Match.com-created email address. Online dating is great in that there is no tradition of the women having to wait for men to pursue them.
• Go on dates. Sometimes the HBS Bubble can make us forget that people in the real world go out on dates. Taking time to opt out of the HBS social scene for two days a week can be a refreshing change to your social life, especially for those men and women who have been surprised at the lack of attention they receive here from potential mates. HBS men and women are big fish among a lot of other big fish when dating within HBS. Go be a big fish in the fairly small pond of online dating.
• Be safe. I don’t think that online dating is populated with people who are any crazier than people in real life. However, sometimes we seem to act like doing and saying things online is less consequential than things we would say or do in person. Don’t tell people where you live, give out your social security number, or anything else silly like that.

An online distribution strategy has great promise for those willing to put in the effort to develop a strategy and execute it. Be a part of shaping this space while it’s still being formed or risk having to play by the rules that someone else has made for you

For two summers, I worked as a teacher for the Breakthrough Collaborative and lived in the Taos housing cooperative on “the drag” in Austin.  My two summers at Taos got me entangled in many adventures and misadventures with the house full of zany characters that ran the place. One of them spoke some wise words to me  while I was living there, and I was reminded of those words today while seeking dating advice and encouragement from Kevin C. (who also lived at Taos, but did not enjoy it nearly as much as I did). Back in 2003, the Taosian said to me:

“Whenever I find myself dissatisfied or unhappy, it’s often because I am comparing myself to others.”

It is so important to remember that:

1. Everyone is on their own journey in life. You can’t walk someone else’s path and call it your own life.

2. You never know what else people have going on in their lives. (Like: The guy who snagged the hot job you wanted actually has a miserable home life)

3. Comparing yourself to others is fruitless, because there will always be someone who is thinner, stronger, smarter, richer, prettier, and more popular than you. And if you think by chance that you might be Mr. #1 something, there is no accurate way to measure these superlatives anyway, so you’ll never know if you are indeed the strongest man in the world or the fastest hot dog eater in America.

It’s funny how easy it is to get sucked into comparing yourself to other people. In a place like Harvard where everyone has been a superstar in their respective communities, I would exhaust myself trying to measure up to others’ performance or accomplishments–be they professional or personal. Despite the conventional wisdom I know deep inside, I still find myself wondering where in this big, round world my “special guy” is or why I have so much grad school debt when so-and-so doesn’t.

You’re only one person. You only get one life…in this body (just had to cover my bases for the diverse belief systems represented among my readership). Live your own life in the colors, sounds, and textures that suit you.  It’s when we focus on being our best selves that the things we truly want come to us anyway.

Whether we’d like to admit it or not, many single HBS students are preoccupied with the search for a mate. For years, we focused our time and energy on our academic and professional achievement, and now that we have “arrived”, we sit back and think, “Now what?” For many of us, the answer to that question is, “Find Mr. or Mrs. Right.”  At first glance, it seems like HBS would be the ideal place to find a mate—especially for women looking for husbands. However, we all know that every business decision is that much stronger when backed up by a trusted HBS framework. Thus, an analysis of the dating environment of HBS using Porter’s Five Forces will inform our conclusion and the inevitable action plan.

The Firms: HBS women are beautiful, ambitious, independent, and accomplished. For the right person, we offer the product of love, companionship, fun, encouragement, and empathy. But is this the right market for us to be offering our products?

Threat of Substitutes: HIGH. A myriad of substitutes for dating an HBS woman exist for the HBS man. The most obvious ones are case preparation, the job hunt, hanging out with his friends, and fulfilling his needs for affection with the post-Redline hookup. Buyer switching costs are low to none, since all it takes is a few clicks to change his Outlook calendar and find something else to occupy his time and attention.

Threat of New Entrants: VERY HIGH. While getting into HBS is very difficult, gaining entry into the HBS dating scene is very easy. New competitors exist in the form of everything from Kennedy School women, grad students at other schools in Boston, undergrads at Harvard and women in the greater Boston area. These new entrants’ comparative advantage is usually having more free time and not being perceived as competitors of HBS men (i.e. not competing for jobs or class participation). New entrants have high access to distribution channels through the widely advertised HBS parties, conferences, and section activities held around town. Retaliation by incumbents will be little more than a few uneasy glances, so the market is essentially wide open to new entrants.

Bargaining Power of Customers: VERY HIGH. Given the high number of substitutes and threat of new entrants, the most desirable HBS men have a ridiculous amount of bargaining power. Low dependence on the existing channels of distribution (classroom interactions, student clubs, Cambridge bars, and section mixers) increases the bargaining power of HBS men.

Bargaining Power of Suppliers: LOW. If HBS women are the firms in the industry, our suppliers are all the businesses that help us bring our product to the market. This is everything from our parents and teachers who contributed to our intelligence and maturity to the salons and gyms that help us stay fit and fabulous. Due to low differentiation of inputs and high degree of substitutes, the bargaining power of suppliers is fortunately quite low.

Competitive Rivalry within the Industry: MEDIUM. Since according to Loveawake dating site survey women comprise only 38% of the RC class, and there is great diversity among the female population, rivalry among us so-called competitors is not tooth-and-nail.  Additionally, classcards lower informational complexity and the rumor mill virtually eliminates information asymmetry. Rivalry is most obvious when it takes place within a section—two beautiful women vying for the love of one fellow sectionmate. We’ve all watched the not-so-subtle flirtations of multiple women with the same “hot guy of the section.” However, low exit barriers (i.e. graduation) and an industry growth CAGR of 5.7% heighten rivalry. (Note: Women comprised 34% of the population for Class of 2008 and 38% of the population for Class of 2010, equaling a CAGR of 5.7%.)

My analysis shows that the HBS market is quite unattractive for women seeking to date HBS men—but that it isn’t a hopeless situation. I recommend the following action plans for our female protagonists:

• Offer a premium product: Being the low-cost provider can only sustain your business for so long. Focus on being your best self and people will be attracted to your positive energy (think pull strategy rather than push strategy).
• Seek out new distribution channels: HBS women have to seek out new ways to meet eligible bachelors. I recommend entering the markets of other graduate schools, professional organizations, and I especially recommend pursuing the online market.
• Increase your bargaining power relative to buyers: Having several willing buyers ensures that no firm feels pressured into any sort of fire sale, giving away its goods and services to whoever is willing to take it. Unless you are absolutely sure that both parties in a relationship are exclusively dating, the HBS woman should make sure to have plenty of options.

In an industry, firms are constantly balancing responding to market realities and working to shape the market itself. I hope these write-ups can be one more tool in the arsenal of those working to increase the size of the dating pie for all of us at HBS.